"IMPOSTER SYNDROME, GO AWAY!"

I think the first time I heard the term “imposter syndrome,” I was in my PhD program. I

had this new sense of fear… of uncertainty …feeling like I didn’t belong. Webster’s

dictionary defines imposter syndrome as “a psychological condition that is characterized

by persistent doubt concerning one's abilities or accomplishments accompanied by the

fear of being exposed as a fraud despite evidence of one's ongoing success.” In even

simpler terms, I describe it as this fear or worry that someone is going to determine that

you are not supposed to in the position that you’re in. They might consider you a fake, a

fraud, or determine that you are not qualified to do whatever it is you are doing. For me,

I couldn’t initially believe that I was accepted into the PhD program. Me… little ole, small

town me? I would often image someone from admissions walking into my classroom

and taking me on my shoulder and telling me that I was admitted by mistake. With each

passed assignment and successful term, I started to believe that I was where I was

supposed to be. From time to time, these imposter syndrome feelings resurfaced.

This most recent incident was after I received an email from my business and branding coach, Latia Vaughan, The Dream Pusher. In the email, there was a list of potential speaking

opportunities that she wanted me to consider applying for this year. Now, while I’m

confident in my abilities to speak and hold the attention of a crowd about my research,

my clinical expertise, and my career journey, these opportunities are not for “science”

conferences. These events are different—more corporate, more mainstream. I panicked.

I closed the email and thought Latia was pushing me further than I wanted,

further than I was ready to go. But then, I took a couple of deep breaths, centered

myself, and let the fear begin to ease away. I spoke with my husband who shared many

of these corporate events like for people to share about their journeys of overcoming

challenges and sharing successes. I thought, maybe I do have something I can share in

these venues.

I remember a meme or hearing a story that said to “say it even if your voice is shaking,”

which to me simply translates to sometimes we say it scared. I think I’m in a season

now where I’m applying for things while being scared, and speaking scared, but that

is okay. My courage is growing with each submitted application. As we are walking into the new year, let’s embrace new challenges. Sometimes, we may have to “borrow” courage from

our family and friends, which is okay. Other times, we get courage from our mentors and

coaches who see things in us, we may not see in ourselves. Either way, let’s be brave,

let’s do it scared. Start that new business. Apply for your dream job. Go back to school.

Let’s not let imposter syndrome win. When we put good out, we get good back.

~ Dr. K